Classy

Obviously I have no self-respect.

The first time I ever had a McRib is a funny story, or a very sad and concerning story, depending on how you look at it. When I was in elementary school, one time my class went on a field trip.  I don’t remember which grade I was in or where we went on the field trip.  I only know that I was very young, still at Fairview, and on the way back from this field trip we stopped at McDonalds, a place my family never went to growing up. Well, on this particular field trip all the other kids got Happy Meals and I got a McRib. Oh yes.  AND I ate the whole thing, onions and all, and it was very good.  I am my father’s daughter, what can I say?

Maybe I have changed things in my mind over the years, but I just remember there being a general astonishment in the air that day among the other kids about me & my “adult” meal.  And then later, when I got home, I told Daddy about it and his eyes got wide and he laughed and I remember feeling like he was impressed and maybe a little proud of me.  Ha!  It’s funny how we remember things like that.  I was so young!  The sad thing is that the McRib is literally the ONLY thing I remember about that trip….not the destination, not my friends, NOTHING but fake pork!  So, like I said, it is either funny or sad, depending on how you look at it. 

So tonight, as I was eating the fat-and-calorie-laden pseudo meat, I got to thinking about my top 10 favorite favorite fast foods……(Kourtney, be careful reading this; it might trigger a binge – YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!)

Top Ten Favorite Fast-Food Items (in no particular order)

1. McDonald’s fries

2. Chick-Fil-A waffle fries

3. Chick-Fil-A chicken nuggets

4. Dominos thin crust pepperoni pizza

5.  Taco Bell Mexi Melt with no pico sauce

6. Chicken McNuggets

7. Auntie Anne’s original pretzel with mustard

8. Subway meatball sub

9. Long John Silvers’ chicken planks

10.  Pizza Hut’s mild buffalo chicken wings + ranch

This is no lie: one evening, in college, a friend and I got in my car and drove around to 3 or 4 different fast food restaurants to make a complete meal.  We got Whoppers, McDonald’s fries, and a Dairy Queen Blizzard for dessert and ate it on the floor of my dorm room before hanging pictures using my high-heeled sandals as a hammer.  So, as you can see, I have always had a very classy life.  HA!

And since I’m on a roll, here’s another one for you (yes, I’m aware that this exercise in gluttony is probably just as unhealthy as the food I am listing):

Top Ten BEST Fast Food Desserts (in no particular order)

1. Chick-Fil-A cookies & cream milkshake (size small) with whipped cream & a cherry on top

2. Krispy Kreme hot doughnuts, obviously

3.  McDonald’s apple pie + soft serve ice cream, eaten like this: one bite of apple pie, one spoon of ice cream & throw the rest of the ice cream away when the pie is gone

4. Bruster’s cookies & cream ice cream (two scoops) in a sugar cone

5. TCBY yogurt parfait with vanilla yogurt + Reese cups ($1.99 on Saturdays!)

6. Reese Blizzard from the Dairy Queen in Pelham, AL – this particular DQ is VERY generous with the Reese’s

7. Strawberry shortcake from SouperSalad (thanks a lot, Mother!)

8. Chocolate Lava Cake from Dominos (my fave!)

9.  Half moon cookies from Full Moon BBQ

10. McDonald’s caramel sundae (very hard to find!)

Why does fast food have to taste so good when it is so terrible for you?!?!  I have seen those documentaries and have read exposes of the fast food industry and honestly, they have not quelled my love for fast food in the least.  Sadly.